Tuff Turf

so last night I dreamt that  I was in a turf war... i woke with two main things in mind....
the first thing was that I do not do well with weapons... I am one of those people who will use anything as a weapon except for a weapon itself. I have been known to try to kill bugs with hair spray, glass cleaner and at the lakehouse I have even used sunscreen. My strategy is to immobilize the bug, then try to squish it with something else handy. I try my best not to kill ladybugs because for some reason I feel it is bad luck, but I also believe that if you swallow one, you will die so I cannot just leave one in my house. Don't know where I heard that, but I did hear it and I believe it. Deep down I don't think I believe that it would actually kill me, but I don't want to chance it. So if a ladybug happens to get in my house, I hunt the thing down until I can catch it and release it back into the "wild" This technique does not apply to any other bug that happens upon my house. I will spend 45 minutes if I have to, to kill a fly who has dared to fly in. The children's book, When the Fly Flew In- would read something like "When the fly flew in, he flew around only to meet the back end of last week's In Touch magazine" Back to the topic of weapons though, I think I would do much better hitting a person with a gun as opposed to shooting one. A few years back, I was shooting at simple targets with a bb gun and could not for the life of me hit anything. After much cursing, I realized I was closing my aiming eye instead of the other one. By no means am I saying I am a wuss. I will defend anything that is mine to defend but expect to be hit with a book, spatula or can of spray starch before I pull a true weapon. If nothing like that is handy,  prepare for my fists, aka thunder and lightning. I have not been in many fights but those I have been in have been quite entertaining to say the least.
The second thing this dream brought to mind was at no point in my dream did I start walking with my gang whilst snapping my fingers in a downward motion. This is very upsetting to me. I would like to think that even in my subconscious I am aware of my amazing dancing ability. I would think that people would immediately appear at my sides with a nice little dance number to break up the violence. If I got to choose my "fight entrance" theme music, it would be the opening chords of The Final Countdown by Europe. Duh nuh nuh na duh nananuh Duh nuh nuh na Duh nananuh. Yeah that would be pretty awesome. Now I also think that depending on the setting, Fame by Irene Cara would be a good fight sequence song, because you ain't seen the best of me yet and also how intimidating would it be to hear REMEMBER MY NAME I'M GONNA LIVE FOREVER whilst going up against me in a dance fight?